I’m pretty bummed that Barbaro didn’t make it. Although I definitely don’t consider myself an animal lover by any means (I always laugh when I see the bumper sticker that says “I love animals. They are delicious”), there’s something sad about putting down a racehorse. With racehorses, it’s amazing how fast and drastically things can change. One minute you’re the fastest horse around, putting together a glorious career while keeping one eye on a career at stud, eating grass and doing other horses. Then you trip. Then you’re suddenly facing death. Damn Seabiscuit. That movie made me wonder about what goes through the minds of race horses. Here are some questions I have about race horses:

(1) Do race horses all like to race?
(2) Do they all like their names?
(2) Are there any horses in history that were born fast, yet born without any motivation to race?
(3) Do race horses look forward to retirement like humans do? (i.e. “I can’t wait Steve, only a few years until I go to stud.”)
(4) Do horses really like eating carrots that much? (this is more of a general horse question).
(5) Do race horses that go to stud miss the competition or do they just like being able to let themselves go, eat all the grass they want, and do other horses?

Sorry Barbaro. Seriously.

How many of these do you think J.Crew sold?

To clarify, these are for men, not kids. Available for the bargain price of $24.99 at jcrew.com, all sales final, no exchanges or returns.

I solved the Yahoo crossword again today but failed on yesterday’s.

I got a churro at Costco today but could only eat half.

I genuinely felt sorry for Andy Roddick today. Seriously.

I learned that grass fed beef cooks faster than regular beef because the marbling has a lower melting point (that’s what the wrapper said).

This Thursday was a letdown with no new episodes of The Office or Scrubs.

The Shins played a show at the Troubadour today at 12 noon. I didn’t go, but I’m always amazed at how many people are able to show up at things that are held during normal working hours.

I’m a fan of this song:

I also read an article about them in the latest GQ while waiting to get a haircut today. The title of the article referenced Natalie Portman’s quote from Garden State. I wonder if they hate it when people mention it.

I noticed that the haircutter chopped off a number of gray hairs today. I wonder if I’m really getting more of them or if they’re the same ones I see every time.

I bought some dandruff shampoo today. That’s not something I’m really proud of, but it happened.

I watched part of the State of the Union address today, along with the Democratic response. When I was a kid, I used to think that I’d be interested in watching these things when I got older. I’m still not interested in them. I think, for the most part, political speeches consist of 20% substance and 80% cornyness. This is coming from a person who has a soft spot for long standing traditions. The countless breaks for applause really kill me. Yeah, I think everyone should have health care. Yeah, I hate relying on foreign oil. Yeah, I agree that what’s going on in Darfur is bad. I don’t see how clapping really adds fortitude to those ideas. It just slows down the speech.

Another thing that bugs is that, oftentimes, speech makers, the President included, will cite to “supporting facts” that aren’t proven. For instance, is “No Child Left Behind” really working that well? Are minority students really “closing the gap?” Isn’t it possible that the military can establish a “democracy” in Iraq without ever seriously curbing sectarian violence? I’m not an expert on foreign policy, but it seems highly unlikely that these warring sects that have hated each other for at least a generation will all of a sudden stop doing it, especially at the urging of 20,000 more American troops.

On a lighter note, I love how the President signs autographs on his way out. It’s very rock star of him to do so.

I also thought it was funny how the President acknowledged Dikembe Mutombo. Whenever I see Mutombo (who is an NBA player, btw), I think of his trademark finger wag. See, he blocks a lot of shots, and when he blocks one, his trademark is to turn to the crowd and wag his finger as if to say “no.” This one time, he did that, but while he was doing it, the other player managed to get the ball back and score the basket while Mutumbo was still wagging his finger. That was one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen in sports. I can’t find it on Youtube, which is really a shame. The Democrats should have gotten a hold of that clip for their response.

Some other random non-political notes:

- I added Cyndi Lauper’s “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun” onto my Ipod. I can’t believe it wasn’t on there before.

- I’ve realized that I really like sandwiches. I can eat sandwiches three meals a day.

- I’ve been trying to do the Yahoo crossword for the last few days. It seems like it’s pretty tough. For some reason, the only one I’ve been able to totally solve recently was the Thursday one last week.

- I’m really happy with this new flash music player. It’s so much better than the last one I had.

Welcome to Sacred Heart

Everything Comes Down to Poo

You’ll Have to Face the Future

Guy Love

Dominican

Friends Forever/You’re Going to be Okay

Or you can just watch

Comfy cushion doubles as flatulence filter

Pillow for the gassy, a not-so-fowl assistant and a ‘Union Jacques’

	The GasBGon anti-flatulence seat cushion encloses a carbon filter in number of decorative styles, including this football print so your Super Bowl guests won’t call you for a personal foul odor. View related photos
MSNBC.com

Flatulence — it may cause uncontrollable giggling among kids, but for the rest us, it’s no laughing matter. Now two entrepreneurs have come the rescue with a seat cushion that also silences the sound and stanches the stink of breaking wind.

The GasBGon, conceived by husband-and-wife team Jim and Sharron Huza — he’s an air-quality and filtration engineer and she studied nursing — is designed to “clear the air, not the room” according the product’s Web site.

“GasBGon seat cushions apply cutting edge carbon filter technology to absorb the sound and odor that accompany flatulence,” the product’s makers claim, adding that it absorbs more than 90 percent of the odor emitted by most “end users.”

The carbon filters eventually need to be replaced, as they are “effective on average six months for women and three months for men.”

** Does this mean that men fart twice as much as women?

This is why Youtube is worth billions

I was laughing out loud at the intro for most recent episode of The Office. Damn I thought it was genius. The whole episode was good, right down to the nuances.

- Michael having his computer say “boobs”

- The look on Karen’s face after the makeover

- The fact that Michael is so offensive yet such a good salesman

- Michael throwing Phyllis’ keys under her car

- Dwight’s pre-sale ritual

- Jim slapping Dwight in the face right before the sale, and Dwight’s look of shock

- Angela’s story about “Noelle and Kurt.” Is Angela’s middle name Noelle? (This question is mostly likely only answerable by Steph.)

- Angela saying “hello?!?!” right after telling her story.

- Andy recovering from screwing up the sale and saying that he “Schruted” it.

- Jim hanging up on Kelly on the sales call

- Phyllis telling Karen she can pay her back for the makeover later, right after telling her about Jim’s crush on Pam

- Jim’s initial reaction to Karen asking him if he had a thing for Pam. That wasn’t funny actually, but it was so perfectly acted. I was really impressed by that.

- Angela visibly trembling with anger at the end

That show has jumped ahead of Scrubs now.

Apologies to Susan, who has already heard me say most of these things.

I’m back into full bar exam studying mode. It’s an awkward feeling. I really don’t mind the studying aspect of it. I figure there are worse things in the world than to be learning things. Spending 4 hours driving to and from Long Beach is something that comes to mind. What I do mind is that all of my motivation is rooted in feelings of vengefulness and shame. What I mean is that all I can think about is how pissed I am that the bar owned me once and how it would feel to fail again. I really don’t think that if I pass this time, that I’ll feel any sort of happiness about it. There’s a difference between real happiness and the feeling of relief that you avoided shame.

I’ve been spending a lot of time at public libraries doing my studying. I realized a few things about public libraries. One is that the daytime patronage is comprised almost entirely of the mentally ill and the elderly. There are tons of people that are talking to themselves, and every 3 hours or so, a crazy guy will break into an expletive-filled tirade that usually lasts for about 20 seconds but can be as long as a minute. It’s bizarre. It’s even more bizarre that most people don’t even flinch when it happens. As for the senior citizens, I see a lot of people talking to themselves and a lot of flatulence. Talking to oneself is very common, and I’ve witnessed two of the loudest, longest farts of my life at the library. I almost wanted to go and congratulate the farters, but I thought that they’d either get embarrassed, or worse, not know they farted. I’m not trying to make fun of the mentally ill or the elderly. I was genuinely impressed with the farting. The capacity of human intestines is mind boggling. Oh, and one more thing. One of the long farters was to my right when he laid it, and when I moved a few minutes later, I had the option of walking either behind him or in front of him. Guess which one I chose.

A few reviews of three libraries:

Westwood Public - a small, fairly modern looking two-story library off Wilshire. Parking rates are 90 minutes free with validation, and $1 for every 30 minutes thereafter. Main library is one single room, including children’s section. Daytime clients tend to be older white people. A few people seemed to demonstrate signs of mental illness, including one guy dressed in army fatigues who claimed to be part of military intelligence. Not a great place to bring children due to the small size and mentally ill crowd.

Do go for the: chance to see fancy automobiles on Wilshire

Don’t go for the: feeling that your kids are entirely safe

Rating: (out of 4)

Arcadia Public (Main) - Large library with free parking lot with ample spaces with two and four hour limits. Library is mainly one story, but has a lot of floor space. Daytime patrons tend to be older white people and Asian fobs. The post-3pm patronage is comprised mainly of Asian high school and junior high students. This is the home of flatulence, where I witnessed the two legendary farts. It’s also the home of a very solid wireless internet connection.

Do go for the: wireless internet and Asian book and video section

Don’t go for the: silence

Rating:

Glendale Public (Main) - Large library with painfully small parking lot with ridiculously short time limits. A multi-story lot across the street with 3 hours parking with library validation makes up for it though. Library is two stories. The patronage of this library is mixed. Tons of regulars here who go around and high five each other. (Regulars are not likely homeless, unless a lot of homeless people watch movies on their portable dvd players, which is entirely possible). Post 3pm patronage is comprised of mostly Filipino and Korean high school students who bring a lot of books, but do very little work. A must see is the Armenian Grandfather Chess room. Predictably, the wireless internet at the Glendale library is much worse than the one at the Arcadia library. It’s official - the only thing Glendale’s got over Arcadia now is better kabobs. Oh, speaking of which, one perk of the Glendale library is that, during business hours, a couple runs a kabob stand right outside the front doors.

Do go for the: Armenian Grandfather Chess Room, Armenian book section, chance to see Asian kids replicate the efficiency of study groups in college

Don’t go for the: wireless internet

Rating: 1/2